Take her out for a meal at a swanky resturant somewhere, buy her the finest champagne and lobster the places sells then start mixing her champagne with snakebite when shes not looking (Usually best to do this when shes in the toilet powdering her nose or is bent down under the table getting something out of her bag) once she's had a few snake bites start rubbing her leg under the table, should get her a little bit hot under the collar, especially in a public place. Garauntee'd though, she will love this! If she twirls her hair or gives you that cheeky 'f*ck my brains out you sexy beast' smile then you know its time to finish the meal and get onto stage 2 of the evening.
Take her out to a late night strip club and feed her a few more snakebites (maybe the odd jaegermeister just to mix things up a little) which should really help get her in the mood. If your feeling flush then you should really pay for her to have a private dance, although if your a bit tight then just watch the softcore public dancers and keep her sweet with some dirty talk. By this point you should be able to hear the waves crashing in her fanny, she will be DRIPPING for you, literally, trust me. This means its time for stage 3!
Get out of the strip club and take her for a kebab (doner's not bad, but shish will be better) and tell them to lay off the salad on her's, its her birthday afterall, she deserves a treat. Once shes eaten her kebab she should be ready to go. Whisper in her ear that you want to get 'it on', and give her a cheeky wink. Slip her a few viagra's under the table (everbody knows when women take viagra that their nipples turn into rocket launchers and their bottom holes go all loose) and get her out of the kebabby. Stage 4...........
Then walk the 'long route' back to your hotel (did I mention you need to book a hotel? You do - this is going to get messy....) and while walking back keep stopping in random alleys to have a quick smooch and maybe slip a finger in, just to check up on the vagina situation. Hopefully by this point she will be half undressed, have make up smeared all over her face, maybe a nip-slip and possibly no knickers (depends how vigourous you are with your fingering?). Once your back at the hotel get straight upto your room, making sure to pay attention to the 'please be quiet, our guests are sleeping', signs. When you get there, get in and lock the door, stage 5 is about to begin.
Push her straight down on the bed, lift up the remains of the clothing and give her another cheeky wink. Bend down with your head between her legs and re-assuring tell her, 'your going to love this, babe', then to top off the magical evening, blow a fat old raspberry into her vagina, giggle like a school girl and click your fingers, to promt all of your friends and family to step out of their hiding places (behing the curtains, in the wardrobe, under the bed etc) and stand back up, and begin laughing and pointing at her with everybody else. make sure the laughing goes on for a good 30 seconds, or until she runs out crying, just to make the moment extra special.
Sorry for wasting your time with that
but at least any present you get her now will seem lovely compared to what COULD have happened?