f*ck off Deli wankers

[cwspellowe]

Grr ready to crack some skulls, forgive me for being very British and venting my anger on an internet forum!

Basically I stay on a main road in the town centre. On my street, outside the flat, there's enough space for four cars to park, then a skip, and then a massive bus stop that's about 60m long. Obviously noone can park at the bus stop, so the only realistic parking is those four spaces. There's a free public car park a block away, the work van won't get on it though due to height restrictions. There's also parking further down the road.

There's a deli downstairs from me who haven't taken too kindly to me parking my vehicles outside my flat. They seem to think they have some legal right to have their vans parked there and have started to get rather pushy in getting me to move my vehicles.

A few weeks ago they left a note on my van windscreen. Now, they see me every day, and could quite easily approach me to voice their concerns, but no, they HAD to go down the note route. I love writing notes.

In their first one, it was on their official headed paper, signed by the owner, and well worded. They made a point about space on the street, and double parking for deliveries, bla bla bla, and suggested I leave them in the car park round the back. This got filed under "B" for Bullshit and mostly ignored. I did however try a wee experiment and leave the van in the spaces further down the road when I was off work for a fortnight. It made f*ck all difference as, every morning, someone else parked in the space and their vans were STILL double parked. Boo f*cking hoo, i figured my experiment proved it made no difference as there would always be someone parked there, sucks to be them but they may have to walk a bit further, what a shame.

Anyway, today I had a less eloquent note scribbled on a bit of lined paper, simply signed "The Deli". The words were, in effect, "move either your car or van, we can't work with this situation".

You can understand why I screwed it up and threw it in the bin. Public road, my house, first come first served, my car, my van. Their problem.

I'm currently wring a rather strong worded email to the owner, they started the note game and i'm finishing it. Why the f*ck should I move out of their way just because they don't like having to park an extra few metres away? They're holding me completely responsible for their delivery drivers double parking. No, the problem from what I see is that the drivers choose to park their vans in the middle of the road, not me. If i'm working and I can't park directly outside a customer's house, I don't double park and blame it on the residents, I find a safe place to park and have to deal with walking a wee bit further. Inconvenience yes, residents' fault though? No.

Someone come give me a shoulder rub before I start swinging fists. Please?

[Eeyore]

yeh youre in the right and theyre in the wrong. end of. Its just life.

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Also i was expecting a racism thread but now ive worked out that that is Delhi not deli.

[Grant]

Park the van through their shop front. Then seeing parking in the road still seems unreasonable....


But on a serious not, f*ck em mate, your doing no wrong...

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yeh youre in the right and theyre in the wrong. end of. Its just life.

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Also i was expecting a racism thread but now ive worked out that that is Delhi not deli.

Not everyone is as racist as you Sam....

[silverzx]

Same thing near my Uni, they charge £1 a ticket (despite if you have 1 hour that day) a day.

Theres a housing estate right next to the uni with free roads.

It's part of the student policy to not park there but if you pay your road tax then who's to stop you?

I'd just ignore them.

[Kimmie]

Do they know you live there, or do they think you're just some random person?

Make it clear that there's no restriction on you parking there, maybe even suggest they research and find a law that says you can't? It'll keep them busy at least!

[Jonny b]

I would go in there and tell em to f*ck off bud!! Public road, you pay road tax and insurance, if they don't like it tough shit

[cwspellowe]

Do they know you live there, or do they think you're just some random person?

Make it clear that there's no restriction on you parking there, maybe even suggest they research and find a law that says you can't? It'll keep them busy at least!

Yep, they know damned well I live there as they know I own both vehicles. I'm also out the front cleaning stuff regularly so they definitely know who I am.

I just think it's chicken shit of them to leave notes on windscreens, probably because they know i'll tell them to f*ck off. The girl that lived here before us didn't drive, you see, so they had their own way.

They even told my disabled pal, who has MS and was in her mobility car, that she couldn't park there as they were expecting a delivery. Her fella told them where to go in the angriest death metal goth rage way ever

[C2K]

Having a problem with my lady garden of a Neighbour . Have come home to 11 scratches on the rallye and 3 on my hdi. Wanker.

[Rippthrough]

Draw a cock on their windscreens in grease. It'll show up every time it rains.

[Dum-Dum]

Clearly just a bunch of lazy lady gardens who cant be bothered to walk.

[Matt]

f*ck them. Just keep writing back to them.

[Kimmie]

Maybe you should take a photo of their double parking.


Then put a note on their van with 'youparklikeacunt.com'

[cwspellowe]

good shout kim

might have a word with the police, it's dangerous for my wee two year old as he can't see traffic, or something like that

[THE_Liam]

Tell the manager you'll never park there again if he can defeat you in a man-on-man fight to the death.

[David]

Ill come help you swing if you want?

[silverzx]

Get a photo of the place (pref with your car outside), I'm curious now.

[Matt]

Tell the manager you'll never park there again if he can defeat you in a man-on-man fight to the death.

This.

Failing that have a 306oc meet along the road all day so they can't park anywhere haha

[cwspellowe]

meet arranged at 10pm when noone's parked there, to continue throughout the week.

No man on man fights to the death i'm afraid, the owner's an ex-army sergeant. I know i'm a rock hard bastard but even I know a bad idea when I hear one.

[THE_Liam]

We should have a meet outside the deli

[C.A.R.]

There's a taxi-driving (always the worst offenders) lady garden living opposite mum and dad who was ex-forces, he somehow thought this meant that he could park wherever he wanted.

Upon failing to answer his door at 2am in the morning we were probably as surprised as he was when the police responded to our call by phoning his mobile and telling him to move his taxi.

Couldn't believe the police went to that much effort, was expecting them to do nothing!

Good luck with the situation dude!

[stevieg]

2 simple words, f*ck em!

[thms182]

Be nice, say you have every right to park there. Keep all the notes from them, they'll get angrier and angrier. When they finally get explicit. Get them done for harassment.

[burnmw]

Be nice, say you have every right to park there. Keep all the notes from them, they'll get angrier and angrier. When they finally get explicit. Get them done for harassment.

This has got to be the best response! Failing that a quick anonymous tip-off to the local health inspectors probably wouldn't go amiss...

[Niall]

Write a letter to the shop stating you have just as much right to park there as they do and if they touch your car to put another note on it, you will take legal action for A) harassment (which it will become as your not in the wrong) and B) Unnecessary messing with your car/van

alternatively, spunk in a envelope, send it to him with a note saying "does this taste farmilar? should do, was on your missus lips last night"

[spike2002]

Get it converted in to a disabled bay for you only. That will piss them off even more :p

[ash240970]

Just so you you know that you really really should entice them to hit you if they are ex forces. They can then be charged with assault with a deadly weapon: their hands. The army are trained to use their hands to kill - not that i want the guy to kill you but the next logical step is a restraining order and his job, Hasta la vista a hole!!!

Or start a rumour saying that rat droppings have been found on their premises and see their trade plummet and they will be out of business in weeks

Or get your friend with MS to write a letter to the local paper saying how upset she has been ever since he incident of being told that she can't park there because the Deli are expecting a delivery - that will also do wonders for their trade lol.

Finally you could also ask them if they own the road?

[Kimmie]

Her fella told them where to go in the angriest death metal goth rage way ever

This sounds A-MAZING

[Scott]

Although some of these suggestions are brilliant, you'll be no better than this guy if you start doing things that harm his business or reputation, and you could get yourself into a lot more trouble that way, too. I'd go with what thms182 said about just being nice and friendly with them.