I know it's cliched, but there's no such thing as can't, that's so important to remember i can't stress it enough. Stop writing off possibilities before you've even tried them, you need to get out and actually do something about your problems. Just trying will make you feel better about it, even if it doesn't work to begin with. Quite frankly, i don't think you're considering your options properly or trying hard enough. Maybe a bit harsh, but you asked for an honest account, so that's what you're getting.
Nothing's ever going to change if you're not willing to put the effort in. Stop spending so much time on here and start looking around for alternative options. Scouring the local papers and job sites for something suitable that doesn't seem to exist may be boring, repetitive and seemingly pointless, but just going through the actions will help you. It will also give you something to distract yourself from your various issues, keep yourself busy and you can kill two birds with one stone.
You will not be able to move out if you don't have an income, it's as simple as that. Living costs money, so you need to find a way of bringing in the dosh, it doesn't have to be conventional. I know a fella who lives off of his own kleeneze business, the effective hourly wage is appalling, but it does what he needs it to and means he doesn't have too much "risky" contact with other people (extreme anger management issues). He maintains having something to do is the best way to deal with his problems, since finding the kleeneze thing he's turned into something of a workaholic, it's worked that well for him. I'm not saying that's necessarily your solution, just that you need to consider every possible angle and, more importantly, get out and start doing something about it.
I thought you were making progress with the travelling thing? Well why stop there? My mission in life is to do better. Not better than other people, just better than i'm doing at the moment. (Probably why i'm often so intolerant/able lol.) This is going to sound a bit odd (and i don't like admitting to things like this) so i hope you take it as encouragement that this is a genuine post, but it should help explain what i mean...
Recently i've been getting in from work and sitting down in front of the computer to chill. By the time Charli gets in i'm absorbed and in no mood for inane chatter about her office or to be bugged about when dinner is going to be ready. Now Charli hasn't brought it up, but she's stopped trying to talk to me when she gets in from work. I know why if i think about it and am honest with myself, so this last week i've been making a concious effort to start doing useful things about half an hour before she gets home, then i'm in a much better frame of mind for conversation when she does get in.
She might not even notice i've done it, but i feel a lot better knowing i've made that change, even though it's not for my benefit. This attitude stretches to every last little detail, and thinking about it is probably a philosophy that would suit your OCD down to the ground.
Hmmm, have written a bit of an essay there, but i hope some of it is helpful.
Nothing's ever going to change if you're not willing to put the effort in. Stop spending so much time on here and start looking around for alternative options. Scouring the local papers and job sites for something suitable that doesn't seem to exist may be boring, repetitive and seemingly pointless, but just going through the actions will help you. It will also give you something to distract yourself from your various issues, keep yourself busy and you can kill two birds with one stone.
You will not be able to move out if you don't have an income, it's as simple as that. Living costs money, so you need to find a way of bringing in the dosh, it doesn't have to be conventional. I know a fella who lives off of his own kleeneze business, the effective hourly wage is appalling, but it does what he needs it to and means he doesn't have too much "risky" contact with other people (extreme anger management issues). He maintains having something to do is the best way to deal with his problems, since finding the kleeneze thing he's turned into something of a workaholic, it's worked that well for him. I'm not saying that's necessarily your solution, just that you need to consider every possible angle and, more importantly, get out and start doing something about it.
I thought you were making progress with the travelling thing? Well why stop there? My mission in life is to do better. Not better than other people, just better than i'm doing at the moment. (Probably why i'm often so intolerant/able lol.) This is going to sound a bit odd (and i don't like admitting to things like this) so i hope you take it as encouragement that this is a genuine post, but it should help explain what i mean...
Recently i've been getting in from work and sitting down in front of the computer to chill. By the time Charli gets in i'm absorbed and in no mood for inane chatter about her office or to be bugged about when dinner is going to be ready. Now Charli hasn't brought it up, but she's stopped trying to talk to me when she gets in from work. I know why if i think about it and am honest with myself, so this last week i've been making a concious effort to start doing useful things about half an hour before she gets home, then i'm in a much better frame of mind for conversation when she does get in.
She might not even notice i've done it, but i feel a lot better knowing i've made that change, even though it's not for my benefit. This attitude stretches to every last little detail, and thinking about it is probably a philosophy that would suit your OCD down to the ground.
Hmmm, have written a bit of an essay there, but i hope some of it is helpful.