Job Hunt and Health Issues

[Toms306]

Problem you've got Tom is that you dismiss any suggestion anyone ever makes without even giving it a shot.

What's stopping you advertising diagnostic services, do a week of it, it it goes pear shaped then at least you can say you've tried. You'll get nowhere, ever if you just say "No I can't do it" - you won't try it, that is the issue.

You didn't reply to my other comment regarding a telephone, what is the issue? No-one is a huge fan of the phone but at least with a phone you can sit on the toilet if it comes to it, you're not face to face, you're in as comfortable surroundings as you're ever being. Stop being scared of trying things.

Everyone does things they don't like/want to do/are worried about doing on a daily basis - it's life, you HAVE to do things you don't like doing. End of.

I did reply about the telephone -

Tom if you can't do face to face you NEED to be able to do telephones, not everything can be done via email.

I bloody hate telephones but I've worked in a call centre environment for 4 years now even though my job is no longer telephone based I have to use the phone daily!

What's wrong with using a phone? You can sit on the toilet whilst on the phone, in your own home, with no-one able to see you.. it doesn't get much easier..

I can do face to face, I find it much easier than telephones. I know that won't make sense to most people lol. Problem is just initially getting to the face to face situation, if the Dominos guy was stood outside having a smoke or something, I'd be able to approach him, what I struggle with there is entering a strange building uninvited, and/or stopping someone from whatever they're doing to listen to me.

Problems with a phone are almost endless, it's a terrible comms device! (IMO of course lol).

-I have the choice not to answer it - don't have that choice if someones stood in front talking lol.
-I struggle to understand people, they struggle to understand me - I know I don't speak overly clearly and it's worse when I'm panicked. Because of that, information is almost always taken down wrong from a call. I also struggle to understand most accents over the phone, seems easier when you can lip read, don't understand that myself but I do know that's sort of specific to me.
-Its invasive - you wouldn't go up to someone and repeatedly poke them until they stop what they're doing like a phone call is essentially doing, feels extremely inconsiderate to me and I'm too British and polite.
-I don't know who or what will be on the other end, fear of the unknown I guess.
-It's instant - I tend to blank when asked a direct question (this part of the interview went badly as you can guess lol) but even face to face you can come back to a topic in 10 minutes time if you blanked earlier on, email is even better because you can re-read and adjust the reply as much as you like but on the phone it's quickly over and gone.
-Phone calls are bloody expensive. I know its not an issue for those of you with nice phones on contract but I'm on PAYG as I use it so rarely, homephone is also expensive during the week, free local weekends though I admit. Email and face to face are free, you're not pre-occupied with the price of the call trying to rush through.

There's probably a lot more...I really do hate the telephone...

As for sitting on the toilet on the phone - never do that, people the other end can hear the echo, splashes and wind so are well aware of what you're doing.

Not sure how you managed to miss that.

Although it seems like I dismiss suggestions, I have done the same or similar before so know what would happen. With the diag stuff, I won't be able to answer the phone guaranteed (proved several times with various previous business ideas). Even if I could it wouldn't work out for the reasons I gave earlier, I hardly ever use the generic reader myself, so why did I think it'd work elsewhere?

I also forget about things I can't do until I'm back in the same situation unable to do it. I realise how daft that sounds, but I am surprisingly optimistic until I try something and realise I can't do it. Has happened several times since being here and trying to do things again after months of not really bothering. And there's the difference between not liking something and being unable to do it. I do things I don't like doing every day, I'm sure everyone does - that's not the same as not being able to do something though.

Utilise a skillset you already have and apply it to make some money through a channel that suits you.

Stuff applying for a job with the likes of hermes.

Think I've pretty much convinced myself I don't have a skillset or any sort of channel that suits me through this thread though.

EFA

That sums it up in a nutshell I'm afraid

Either accept you don't feel like you can do anything and bask in it and enjoy your life in some other way that suits you, or find a tool that helps you turn your negative thoughts into positive actions

/thread

Is that a fact or your opinion?

I'm not sure there is a tool for that is there? Can I just bodge it with a hammer instead?

In all seriousness though, I do kind of agree. I thought I'd be able to do certain things by now that I still can't and don't seem to be able to make any progress in some areas at all. Not really sure what the solution is there though.

Tom, you have qualifications in two industries that are crying out for new starters. Why not force your self to get on with one of them? Don't forget, just because you've trained as a electrician doesn't mean you have to be house bashing. You could happily use your qualification to go into an advanced apprenticeship in any electrical field. Industrial work, panel building, PV etc. You could even do what i do if it really took your fancy.
No one ever said this was going to be easy Tom. I understand you've got your fears and they will be extremely difficult to get around. Some employers may not understand them at first but you need to push on and show these people that you are keen to work.
Lets be honest, if you don't sort your self out a job, you're going to be back home with your parents soon. Im sure you don't want that and I'm sure people who know you don't. I don't because I've seen how much you've changed and your attitude has improved just from talking to you since you've moved out.

Really push your self Tom. It won't be easy, probably won't be pleasant either but do it and the rewards will be great.

There's no way I could do an apprenticeship in my current state though, I couldn't do the long hours or live on an apprentice wage. Plus I couldn't do site work because of food and toilet issues. Pretty much the same reasons I never done one before, it's not so much the work (though I'm not keen on the responsibility of electrics admittedly) but the 'social' aspect of work. I naively thought that would change to an extent but it doesn't seem to have done at all.

You are right, I won't be surprised if I end up back at home at the beginning of next year. Whilst moving out has improved some things, if it hasn't altered my ability to work then I'll have no choice but to go back home. That's a bridge to cross when it comes though.