Unconventional Income

[C.A.R.]

Tom, have known you for a long while and as others will testify this is a thread not dissimilar to others you have posted before.

Now some of the issues you have are genuinely not very nice and we can only speculate what it must be like to live with them. However, some of these issues can be overcome and are purely state-of-mind. I think you recognise this yourself but haven't been empowered to do anything or provided with the correct outlet to overcome them. 

I'm not trying to be an amateur psychiatrist but I definitely feel that you need to set yourself some targets. There's nothing physically stopping you using a public toilet but fear itself. I worked for someone who had incredibly similar issues and it took him far too long to come to terms with his problems and take control of his life. But you know where he is now? Touring America with his wife on yet another extended holiday. 

He is now in his 40s and it took him until he was in his late 30s to start making changes. I wouldn't want you to wait that long.

You need to get professional help and support. You need to have the confidence to be away from your preferred loo. You also need to start believing in yourself; a negative attitude is going to set you up for failure. 

Focus on the skills you do have rather than those which you don't.  You write clearly and comprehensively,  something which escapes 80% of the "professional" workers i have come across. Presumably you can operate a computer rather competently too, considering the time you spend sitting in front of one! 

If you can use excel, write emails and show technical understanding you can do pretty much any entry-level office job. What you need is the confidence and self-belief.

Start with the basics and work your way up. Stop being negative.