The BEST 306 ad!

[Ed Doe]

Definitely worth quoting to preserve it forever!

Posted Date : 2012-02-02
Area : Belfast
Model : 306 xldt
Body : 5 Door Hatchback
Seller type : Private
Manufacturer : Peugeot
Colour : Maroon
Mileage : 170000
Fuel type : Diesel
Transmission : Manual
Engine : 1905
Agency? : N
Registered : 1996-02-29T00:00:00
OK, let me start off by saying that this car is only available for purchase by the manliest of men. My friend, if this car was any manlier, it would sprout chest hair and have a five o'clock shadow like Stallone. It is just that manly.

It was never intended to drive you to the shops to pick up that cute pottery set you had your eye on. It was never meant to transport you to Zumba or Pilates. No. That my friend, is what your Toyota is for. If that is the kind of car you are looking for then do us all a favor and stop reading right now. Seriously, just stop.

This car was engineered by French ninjas to serve the needs of a man who cheats death on a daily basis. They didn't even consider superfluous nancy boy amenities like satellite navigation systems (real men don't get lost) heated leather seats (a real man doesn't let anything warm his arse) or cruise control (real men have the pedal to the metal) No, this bad boy comes with all the equipment a testosterone fueled action junkie needs. It has a turbo charged engine to outrun the cops. It has a place to put your beer. It even has a "glove" box to store your weapons should you be hijacked by terrorists while going about your business.

It has four doors, so you can fit in the hotties you picked up on the way to the gym to blast your pecs and work on your triangle. There is a massive boot that will fit more hookers than an MP's credit card. It has enough Tax and MOT that you can drive it wherever you need to go all through February. It has manually operated windows so you can blast your guns while winding down the windows to choke out car jackers. This car has it all.

My price on this bad boy is a ridiculously low �£275 pounds. I will accept reasonable offers. And by reasonable I don't mean walk up to me and tell me that you'll give me �£100 for it. That's liable to earn you a Burmese roundhouse sphincter kick with a follow up three fingered eye jab. Would it hurt? Hell yeah it would hurt. Letâ��s just say you wouldn't be the prettiest guy at the Bieber concert any more.

If you were the extra manly type you could break this beast and transplant the power plant into an even manlier shell. The engine in this thing will outlive you and the children that will carry your name. It will live on forever as a monument to your machismo. Every time this sucker fires up NASA get teary about the earth turning backwards. If you�re interested, get on the phone quick.
Chuck Norris just called and he wants a piece.