10-06-2012, 08:34 PM
Do you ever get those days when you just feel that, despite your best efforts, any attempt at getting anything done is futile?
Today I set about replacing the front bumper on the F*cking-Focus. What a hateful, hateful car to work on.
The first thing was to jack the car up, simple enough, the standard suspension should make this easy.
Oh no, the jack won't reach under the cills. So scissor jack first (didn't have anything to drive onto) making the process twice as long.
Stage 1 complete, wheels removed. 30 bloody minutes later.
Next up, I need to remove the arch liners, just so I can remove the headlights. Painful exercise let me tell you, as you reach into the front bumper from the arch, feeling for a 10mm bolt securing the headlights. Once this is done you need to simply unclip the headlight unit from the loom.
Even this, simple, 2-second-at-the-most task took a good 5 minutes faffing around with the plug because a tab had broken off and the headlamp had decided that it didn't want to be parted with the car.
Headlights now off. Moving on.
Grille comes off, piece of piss. Finally some respite.
Bumper now, Haynes says this is the easy bit, "simply remove the 3 bolts securing the bumper to each wing"
"simply" was a poor use of literature. Whilst modern Fords are losing their image of being rust-buckets the bolts holding them together still maintain the moniker, with every one of the 6 I needed to remove an absolute b*stardisation of the bolt that it once represented. Rusted. To. F*ck.
Access to each bolt head was of course, absolutely crap. With a lot of swearing I had finally removed my old knackered bumper some 2 hours before starting. I never want to hear you moan about working on your 306s again, because bumper removal on those is a doddle compared to this bullsh*t.
At this point it would be nice to be able to say "reassembly was simply a reverse of the above steps" but oh no, it was a real pain in the arse.
A front lower splitter on most regular cars is, at the very least, bolted on. Or screwed on. Or bonded on.
On a Focus, it f*cking clips on. But the force you need to apply to 'clip' it to the front bumper is equivalent to that of forcing an elephant into a porta-loo. It ain't gonna happen.
After 7 and a half hours on the Focus, it was all finished. I was too depressed to take a "yay look I've finished" picture so just have this one from halfway through.
![[Image: 194ec4c5.jpg]](http://i430.photobucket.com/albums/qq25/chris_rx71/194ec4c5.jpg)
I hate this car.
Today I set about replacing the front bumper on the F*cking-Focus. What a hateful, hateful car to work on.
The first thing was to jack the car up, simple enough, the standard suspension should make this easy.
Oh no, the jack won't reach under the cills. So scissor jack first (didn't have anything to drive onto) making the process twice as long.
Stage 1 complete, wheels removed. 30 bloody minutes later.
Next up, I need to remove the arch liners, just so I can remove the headlights. Painful exercise let me tell you, as you reach into the front bumper from the arch, feeling for a 10mm bolt securing the headlights. Once this is done you need to simply unclip the headlight unit from the loom.
Even this, simple, 2-second-at-the-most task took a good 5 minutes faffing around with the plug because a tab had broken off and the headlamp had decided that it didn't want to be parted with the car.
Headlights now off. Moving on.
Grille comes off, piece of piss. Finally some respite.
Bumper now, Haynes says this is the easy bit, "simply remove the 3 bolts securing the bumper to each wing"
"simply" was a poor use of literature. Whilst modern Fords are losing their image of being rust-buckets the bolts holding them together still maintain the moniker, with every one of the 6 I needed to remove an absolute b*stardisation of the bolt that it once represented. Rusted. To. F*ck.
Access to each bolt head was of course, absolutely crap. With a lot of swearing I had finally removed my old knackered bumper some 2 hours before starting. I never want to hear you moan about working on your 306s again, because bumper removal on those is a doddle compared to this bullsh*t.
At this point it would be nice to be able to say "reassembly was simply a reverse of the above steps" but oh no, it was a real pain in the arse.
A front lower splitter on most regular cars is, at the very least, bolted on. Or screwed on. Or bonded on.
On a Focus, it f*cking clips on. But the force you need to apply to 'clip' it to the front bumper is equivalent to that of forcing an elephant into a porta-loo. It ain't gonna happen.
After 7 and a half hours on the Focus, it was all finished. I was too depressed to take a "yay look I've finished" picture so just have this one from halfway through.
I hate this car.
Disclaimer: The above is not to be taken to heart and is probably a joke, grow up you big girl.
![[Image: Sig500x130.png]](http://i430.photobucket.com/albums/qq25/chris_rx71/Sig500x130.png)
Good to know its not just me though.
![[Image: tapatalk_1427020983519_zpsnwvozlhb.jpeg]](http://s768.photobucket.com/user/annegg5511/media/Mobile%20Uploads/tapatalk_1427020983519_zpsnwvozlhb.jpeg.html)
