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+--- Thread: So now I think I understand... (/showthread.php?tid=5632)
So now I think I understand... - InkedMuttley - 18-08-2012
The whole thing about being friend-zoned...After 9 years of being single and going on countless dates etc my lack of confidence to go in for the kill has led me many times to be friend-zoned but now I think I understand it all. Basically where I work there's a new girl just started well about 4 weeks ago but I've only been back in for 2/3 weeks. First time I met her I was minding the shop and she was late she came up the path and instantly my eyes were drawn to her she walked in the shop I got tongue-tied she smiled at me and just said "You're in my spot!" wondered what was going on as I didn't know of any new staff.
Either way from that day on when we're at work we are both inseperable and she will not work unless I'm there in her own words "It's so much more fun!" I have been working with her for the 2 weeks and in them two weeks we've found a lot out about each other, she has the same medical problems as myself, her favourite subject in school was my favourite subject etc I again quote her "If it wasn't for the age difference we could have been seperated at birth"
Now as time has gone on I've now started seeing her outside work hours I've met her dad as she has met my mother. Last night we was out gallivanting until 4am as she couldn't sleep and neither could I she had a bad day and I had too (family problems won't bore you with those too!) she's been there to pick up my mood and I have been there to pick her mood up.
Now comes the annoying and really upsetting bit for me: I really like this girl, and when I say like I mean I have never felt as strong for anyone before sure in the past I have had feelings but I have had to grow to them first with her I've felt so comfortable that I am able to show the true me from the start. She has just come out of a relationship like literally a week or so. But the thing is although I really want this girl in my life as more than a friend I don't want to lose her as a friend.
Please can somebody tell me where to go with it I really would like to be with her but if I jump too soon I'm gunna freak her out, if I don't jump soon enough I'm going to be friend-zoned...Is there a happy medium?
I was almost so close to telling her last night and she knew it, she can read me like a book she said to me "There's something on your mind isn't there, c'mon, spill it!" I couldn't.
Anybody that can help to me is a legend female advice would be nice too!
RE: So now I think I understand... - Mattcheese31 - 18-08-2012
if there was a "right way/time to do it some fcuker would write it in a book and make a gazillion quid mate . . . . . .that's the thing about relationships they are all so unique, you really have to weigh it all up yourself, i know what you mean about the friendzone thing though, as i'm kinda in a similar situation . . . . . (not going into that here though) . . . .you'll know when the time is right . .don't fcuking wimp out though .
. . . . . it's worse i know when you actually really like a girl as well so you might stand to lose her friendship if your affections aren't returned . . . .. .just go for it mate, life is too short to hang around, just think how you'd feel if someone else took her from under your nose . .
all the best . . .
RE: So now I think I understand... - InkedMuttley - 18-08-2012
(18-08-2012, 02:38 PM)Mattcheese31 Wrote: if there was a "right way/time to do it some fcuker would write it in a book and make a gazillion quid mate . . . . . .that's the thing about relationships they are all so unique, you really have to weigh it all up yourself, i know what you mean about the friendzone thing though, as i'm kinda in a similar situation . . . . . (not going into that here though) . . . .you'll know when the time is right . .don't fcuking wimp out though .
just go for it mate, life is too short to hang around, just think how you'd feel if someone else took her from under your nose . .
all the best . . .
Thanks mate I do know if someone else got the girl it would destroy me...I don't actually believe in love to be honest, but this one I dunno there's something special and her ex-fiancee I do know was her best friend to start with but in the past I've not said anything to sort of gauge the situation if that makes sense and just when I'm ready to make a move I'll look on facebook or something and see the dreaded words "Such and such is in a relationship with Joe Bloggs" but with her I honestly don't know how I'd handle it
RE: So now I think I understand... - Tom - 18-08-2012
Show her this? Or get someone else to show her here then act like you dont know lol
RE: So now I think I understand... - 4WayDiablo - 18-08-2012
Being work mates would complicate things a little because it it goes royally tits up then you still have to go to work with her
I'd think that if you say you were going to say something g and she defiantly knew something and still wants to hang out a lot then go in for the kill
Failing that go to a party or something, out to the pub. Have a few drinks and get to the point between tipsy and drunk then go in for a kiss. If she refuses then you have your answer then proceed to apologise then blame it on the drink. If she bites then biiiingo .. quids in :-)
RE: So now I think I understand... - Matt - 18-08-2012
Just shag her and see if she's good in the sack
Then proceed if it's good and sack her off is she's shit
RE: So now I think I understand... - InkedMuttley - 18-08-2012
(18-08-2012, 02:54 PM)4WayDiablo Wrote: Being work mates would complicate things a little because it it goes royally tits up then you still have to go to work with her
I'd think that if you say you were going to say something g and she defiantly knew something and still wants to hang out a lot then go in for the kill
Failing that go to a party or something, out to the pub. Have a few drinks and get to the point between tipsy and drunk then go in for a kiss. If she refuses then you have your answer then proceed to apologise then blame it on the drink. If she bites then biiiingo .. quids in :-)
She has invited me to a piss up at her place on Tuesday, even invited me around for dinner we're going to have a cook-off she says she can make a better Spag Bol than me but we'll see but the problem is, she lives 13 miles away so if I do get pissed I can't drive and if I don't get pissed then I lose my bottle! Would help if I had family or a friend that could take me home at the end of the night
RE: So now I think I understand... - Mattcheese31 - 18-08-2012
do the ooppsy . . . . . i've had a little too much to drink . . ..can i fcuk your couch? . . .sorry sleep on your couch? . .
RE: So now I think I understand... - 4WayDiablo - 18-08-2012
Make it work :-p
Even if its a taxi. Gotta make the investment. Also is she hawt?
And defiantly need pics!
RE: So now I think I understand... - Niall - 18-08-2012
There is no right time or wrong time. You just need to MTFU and do it. End of the day, what's the worst that can happen? She says no, you both just crack on as usual.
I did the same with my misses. Spent ages thinking shall I do it and in the end I left it too late. Thankfully 6 months down the line she changed her mind.
Give her a ring and see if she's up for a drink tonight, take her out, date ra*e her then ask! Even if she Questions you about it the next day, you can just deny it. Easy!
RE: So now I think I understand... - InkedMuttley - 18-08-2012
(18-08-2012, 03:00 PM)4WayDiablo Wrote: Make it work :-p
Even if its a taxi. Gotta make the investment. Also is she hawt?
And defiantly need pics!
That's the thing...she's not generally my type she's quite short she has a few extra pounds but not fat she's of average size really, but she is extremely pretty but for some reason...I just can't get her out of my head, she's perfect.
RE: So now I think I understand... - 4WayDiablo - 18-08-2012
Defiantly sounds like you have made your mind up :-) go for it :-)
So now I think I understand... - kentiiboii - 18-08-2012
Dude if you don't go for it you'll loose it! Worst case senereaio shell say no and it'll be odd at work for a few days.
Best case she could feel the same. As said if she knows something's on your mind and she's still sticking around she most likely knows what's up.
And dude the chubbier ones appreciate it more! Can f**k a girl and hold nothing to hold onto just not fun.
RE: So now I think I understand... - Niall - 18-08-2012
(18-08-2012, 03:06 PM)InkedMuttley Wrote:(18-08-2012, 03:00 PM)4WayDiablo Wrote: Make it work :-p
Even if its a taxi. Gotta make the investment. Also is she hawt?
And defiantly need pics!
That's the thing...she's not generally my type she's quite short she has a few extra pounds but not fat she's of average size really, but she is extremely pretty but for some reason...I just can't get her out of my head, she's perfect.
Mate you would be a really shallow wanker of you went out with a bird purely because she's good looking. Fair play if you've just pulled some bird in a club and don't care if you see her again but if you really like her, you generally look past that sort of thing.....well if she was a morbidly obese quadriplegic with 1 tit, that might be a bit odd
RE: So now I think I understand... - InkedMuttley - 18-08-2012
Okay at the risk of looking like a stalker...pics were needed as proof!
![[Image: 6456_103641463098_1750870_n.jpg]](http://images.mafiacrime.org/i/6456_103641463098_1750870_n.jpg)
That's not even the best picture of her!
RE: So now I think I understand... - Toby - 18-08-2012
Needs a 40mm drop and clones tbh..
So now I think I understand... - kentiiboii - 18-08-2012
Where she from looks familiar
RE: So now I think I understand... - Mattcheese31 - 18-08-2012
are we talking about the girl with the green hair here? . . . . coz if we are how the fcuk is she overweight? . . . . .a tiny bit of cushion for the pushin' maybe but hell! . .
RE: So now I think I understand... - InkedMuttley - 18-08-2012
(18-08-2012, 04:14 PM)Mattcheese31 Wrote: are we talking about the girl with the green hair here? . . . . coz if we are how the fcuk is she overweight? . . . . .a tiny bit of cushion for the pushin' maybe but hell! . .
I didn't say she were overweight I said she were average size!
RE: So now I think I understand... - MrsMidnight - 18-08-2012
In my opinion, go for it! Never know unless you try! If worst happens then just remember that it's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all
So now I think I understand... - kentiiboii - 18-08-2012
Listen to emma she's female... Females will never lie or mess you around!
RE: So now I think I understand... - InkedMuttley - 18-08-2012
(18-08-2012, 04:29 PM)MrsMidnight Wrote: In my opinion, go for it! Never know unless you try! If worst happens then just remember that it's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all
When you're rejected by every female you've approached you kinda get a little bit shy with it...Just for once I wish the female would try to make the first move!
RE: So now I think I understand... - JamesG - 18-08-2012
(18-08-2012, 04:31 PM)kentiiboii Wrote: Listen to emma she's female... Females will never lie or mess you around!
at the risk of a debate BULLSHIT!
Girls do lie and mess you about (not all but some do!)
Go for it mate man up and take the leap! If your not sure but part of you does and part of you doesn't then do it because then you can;t regret it! sounds backwards but trust me!
RE: So now I think I understand... - Mattcheese31 - 18-08-2012
(18-08-2012, 04:22 PM)InkedMuttley Wrote:(18-08-2012, 04:14 PM)Mattcheese31 Wrote: are we talking about the girl with the green hair here? . . . . coz if we are how the fcuk is she overweight? . . . . .a tiny bit of cushion for the pushin' maybe but hell! . .
I didn't say she were overweight I said she were average size!
ahemmm!!! . ." she's quite short she has a few extra pounds" . . . . . . .
RE: So now I think I understand... - 4WayDiablo - 18-08-2012
(18-08-2012, 04:41 PM)JamesG Wrote:Don't think kentii was being serious hahah(18-08-2012, 04:31 PM)kentiiboii Wrote: Listen to emma she's female... Females will never lie or mess you around!
at the risk of a debate BULLSHIT!
Girls do lie and mess you about (not all but some do!)
Go for it mate man up and take the leap! If your not sure but part of you does and part of you doesn't then do it because then you can;t regret it! sounds backwards but trust me!
RE: So now I think I understand... - Scott - 18-08-2012
(18-08-2012, 03:04 PM)Niall Wrote: I did the same with my misses. Spent ages thinking shall I do it and in the end I left it too late.Not going to lie mate, knowing you and reading that, I was half expecting the next sentence to be: "Then I met Fiona" or something along those lines
Also:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u6ALySsPXt0
/thread
RE: So now I think I understand... - Matt - 18-08-2012
If you don't. I will.
Go for it mate, the way for talking about her you should crack on.
I'm in the same situation currently. But we are a lil more advanced at this moment in time
RE: So now I think I understand... - Toms306 - 18-08-2012
(18-08-2012, 04:14 PM)Mattcheese31 Wrote: are we talking about the girl with the green hair here? . . . . coz if we are how the fcuk is she overweight? . . . . .a tiny bit of cushion for the pushin' maybe but hell! . .
Isn't it blue hair? Either way, not bad tbh..... Go for it Muttley.
RE: So now I think I understand... - Stephen - 18-08-2012
Yeah blatant sarcasm :p
Just to for it mate! It's just going to annoy you otherwise and always be on your mind! Get in there before you become 'too good friends it would be weird' just let her know how you feel!
Don't go all out and tell her your in love with her or anything but suggest you think about her I'n that way and maybe suggest doing some sort of romantic date just the two of you.
I'm sure if she's decent she will still stay mates!
RE: So now I think I understand... - MrsMidnight - 18-08-2012
My opinion of females:
90% of them are stupid bitches who aren't worth anyone's time in this world, hardly any can even drive a car properly ffs. They mess men about and are generally stupid cuts. Only thing women are good for are sex, food making, house work and a cuddle if you need one. Too many are way to self involved, bitchy and need to take of there rose tinted glasses to see the world for what it is while having a cup of Man The f*ck up.