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It's the end of the world.... - Printable Version

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It's the end of the world.... - samass - 20-12-2012

...as we know it, and zombies are taking over!

Right, seeing as the world might end tomorrow, there's a chance that zombies will try and take over, and eat your guts and brains and whatnot.

I've come up with a survival plan.

1. Fit bull bars and a lift kit to the NAD. Along with grills over the windows and bodicca wheels spikes.

2. Raid tesco for tinned food and water and veg. Standard really.

3. Raid B&Q for survival equipment, I'm talking crowbars, hatchets, hoes, chainsaws, hammer drills, nail guns, the lot. Anything that can be used as a weapon. Oh and hammer and nails and wood to fortify the house.

4. Find a nice little place in the country, with access to shotguns.

5. Survive, and then repopulate the earth with non-zombie seed.

What's your guys' plans?


RE: It's the end of the world.... - Poodle - 20-12-2012

Watch you do the leg work, ra*e you to death and take your spot.

You asked.


RE: It's the end of the world.... - samass - 20-12-2012

(20-12-2012, 11:33 PM)Poodle Wrote: Watch you do the leg work, ra*e you to death and take your spot.

You asked.

Hmm... you'll go far I think...


RE: It's the end of the world.... - Jonny81191 - 20-12-2012

As we discussed, I'm gonna disguise myself and gain their trust. Then kill them all with a scythe or machete. Then come and join in the party in your country hut Big Grin


RE: It's the end of the world.... - samass - 20-12-2012

(20-12-2012, 11:34 PM)Jonny81191 Wrote: As we discussed, I'm gonna disguise myself and gain their trust. Then kill them all with a scythe or machete. Then come and join in the party in your country hut Big Grin

The issue with your plan tho... are you gunna be on stilts? Everyone knows that you have to cut off the head or smash in their brains.


RE: It's the end of the world.... - Jonny81191 - 20-12-2012

Issue with your plan: Where are the fricking tomatoes?


RE: It's the end of the world.... - samass - 20-12-2012

Good point. I'd have to have a f*ck off great big greenhouse in my country retreat.


RE: It's the end of the world.... - Poodle - 20-12-2012

(20-12-2012, 11:34 PM)samass Wrote: Hmm... you'll go far I think...

I'll go all the way...

I'd say don't forget the lube, but nothing is going to help you enjoy this, so may as well give it up as a bad job from the get go.

EDIT: Jonny, zombie policemen can't fly their helicopters, well-known fact. Just pick one of those babies up and switch the infra-red on, job done.


RE: It's the end of the world.... - Andy - 20-12-2012

Okay, so Zombies are taking over.

1. I'd start gathering supplies and load them into the closest diesel I could find. (Epic mpg's and torque to push through the inevitable horde of the undead)

2. Get in the car and set my Sat Nav for Dunkeswell near Honiton.

3. I'll get everyone together I really wanted to save without endangering myself and family/freinds.

4. Hoon down all the quiet roads and get there asap!!

5. Once at Dunkeswell I'll get to hangar 4 at the back of the airfield and break in to find a TBM 700 (Plane Porn)

6. I'll be flying my arse out of there and on to the continent just because I can.

7. Land somewhere remote and hold up here.

8. I'll then head to the Winchester, have a pint, and wait for all this to blow over.


RE: It's the end of the world.... - Curt - 20-12-2012

(20-12-2012, 11:38 PM)Poodle Wrote: I'll go all the way...

I'd say don't forget the lube, but nothing is going to help you enjoy this, so may as well give it up as a bad job from the get go.

lmao


RE: It's the end of the world.... - samass - 20-12-2012

(20-12-2012, 11:38 PM)Poodle Wrote: I'll go all the way...

I'd say don't forget the lube, but nothing is going to help you enjoy this, so may as well give it up as a bad job from the get go.

EDIT: Jonny, zombie policemen can't fly their helicopters, well-known fact. Just pick one of those babies up and switch the infra-red on, job done.

how will infra red help? zombies are dead, therefore cold, no?

(20-12-2012, 11:40 PM)Andy Wrote: 8. I'll then head to the Winchester, have a pint, and wait for all this to blow over.

YES!


RE: It's the end of the world.... - c.gerrard - 20-12-2012

I'm going to go find Will Smith Smile He's quite good at saving the world.


RE: It's the end of the world.... - Niall - 20-12-2012

clearly no one has thought about this.

1. top up oyster card
2. hop on train to london zoo
3. find a kangaroo and kidnap the bastard
4. breed it with a octopus
5. biologically engineer the octoroo to have guns and lasers on its tentacles controlled via a xbox controller hard wired (none of this battery shit) in its pouch
6. hop in and go kill some zombie shit


RE: It's the end of the world.... - samass - 20-12-2012

(20-12-2012, 11:46 PM)Niall Wrote: clearly no one has thought about this.

1. top up oyster card
2. hop on train to london zoo
3. find a kangaroo and kidnap the bastard
4. breed it with a octopus
5. biologically engineer the octoroo to have guns and lasers on its tentacles controlled via a xbox controller hard wired (none of this battery shit) in its pouch
6. hop in and go kill some zombie shit

this isn't a joke thread, serious suggestions only please.


RE: It's the end of the world.... - Niall - 20-12-2012

(20-12-2012, 11:47 PM)samass Wrote:
(20-12-2012, 11:46 PM)Niall Wrote: clearly no one has thought about this.

1. top up oyster card
2. hop on train to london zoo
3. find a kangaroo and kidnap the bastard
4. breed it with a octopus
5. biologically engineer the octoroo to have guns and lasers on its tentacles controlled via a xbox controller hard wired (none of this battery shit) in its pouch
6. hop in and go kill some zombie shit

this isn't a joke thread, serious suggestions only please.

oi man i got a C in gcse science so i can do this shit!


RE: It's the end of the world.... - Andy - 20-12-2012

(20-12-2012, 11:40 PM)Andy Wrote: 8. I'll then head to the Winchester, have a pint, and wait for all this to blow over.

YES!
[/quote]

You know man!

Quote fail!

Mehh


RE: It's the end of the world.... - Jonny81191 - 20-12-2012

(20-12-2012, 11:46 PM)c.gerrard Wrote: I'm going to go find Will Smith Smile He's quite good at saving the world.

and Jeff Goldblum, he'll be useful. And Nick Frost.


RE: It's the end of the world.... - Poodle - 20-12-2012

Heat signature from light set-ups, no? Guessing the zombie drug-dealers won't be turning of their UV lamps, hopefully it'll actually be a vampire apocalypse, then they won't be able to get close enough to turn them off.


RE: It's the end of the world.... - samass - 20-12-2012

ahhhhhh now I get you! I like how you think there Alex Wink


RE: It's the end of the world.... - Poodle - 20-12-2012

You and me should "chat"...


RE: It's the end of the world.... - Jonny81191 - 20-12-2012

Oh god not vampires. Imagine all the stupid girls running to them lol


RE: It's the end of the world.... - Dum-Dum - 20-12-2012

If the zombies are only out to eat peoples brains you lot have nothing to worry about.


RE: It's the end of the world.... - Poodle - 20-12-2012

I'll do swapsies for miss Knightley any day.


RE: It's the end of the world.... - samass - 20-12-2012

(20-12-2012, 11:51 PM)Poodle Wrote: You and me should "chat"...

hmm... key pasa? (yeah i dont speak french)

(20-12-2012, 11:51 PM)Jonny81191 Wrote: Oh god not vampires. Imagine all the stupid girls running to them lol

it's fine, vampires aren't real!


RE: It's the end of the world.... - Jonny81191 - 20-12-2012

(20-12-2012, 11:53 PM)Dum-Dum Wrote: If the zombies are only out to eat peoples brains you lot have nothing to worry about.

And you do I suppose? Puh-leease...


RE: It's the end of the world.... - samass - 20-12-2012

yeah, what Jonny said! LOLZ


RE: It's the end of the world.... - lolsteve - 20-12-2012

I shall breed with the zombie women, learn their ways, gain their trust and in time our differences will become one.


RE: It's the end of the world.... - samass - 20-12-2012

(20-12-2012, 11:56 PM)lolsteve Wrote: I shall breed with the zombie women, learn their ways, gain their trust and in time our differences will become one.

gross. still, wouldn't need lube....


RE: It's the end of the world.... - lolsteve - 20-12-2012

Don't now.

Just need a biteable pillow


RE: It's the end of the world.... - Niall - 21-12-2012

(20-12-2012, 11:59 PM)lolsteve Wrote: Don't now.

Just need a biteable pillow

you wouldnt if you stopped letting these zombie birds do you up the arse with sams strap on!